Alcohol intervention

Watching someone you care about struggle with alcohol addiction can be heartbreaking, especially when they do not seem to hear your concerns. You may feel helpless, unsure of what to say or worried about making things worse. If this sounds familiar, an alcohol intervention could be a way to help them see the impact of their drinking and encourage them to get support.

This guide will walk you through what an alcohol intervention is, how to prepare for it and the best ways to approach it with care and understanding.

What is an alcohol intervention?

An alcohol intervention is a structured conversation where loved ones come together to express their concerns about someone’s drinking and encourage them to seek help. It is not about attacking or shaming the person. Instead, it is a way to show them, with care and support, how their drinking is affecting both themselves and those around them.

For many people struggling with alcohol, denial can be a major barrier. They may not see their drinking as a problem or may believe they have it under control. An intervention provides a moment where they can hear from the people who care about them most and begin to recognise the impact of their alcohol use.

Interventions do not always lead to immediate acceptance but they can plant a seed. Even if the person is not ready to get help right away, knowing they have support can make all the difference when they decide to take that step.

How to plan for an alcohol intervention

When you’re watching someone you love struggle with alcohol, it’s natural to feel an urge to act immediately. You might be frustrated, scared or desperate for them to see the damage their drinking is causing.  But rushing in without a plan can make the person defensive or shut them down completely. That’s why it’s important to take a step back, stay calm and prepare.

Here are a few key points to keep in mind when planning an alcohol intervention.

1. Choose the right people

An intervention should include a small, supportive group of people the individual trusts. This might be close family members, close friends or even a professional interventionist. Avoid including anyone who may become confrontational or overly emotional, as this could push the person further into denial.

2. Pick a suitable location

Choose a private, familiar place where the person feels safe, such as a family home. Avoid public places where they may feel embarrassed or pressured. The setting should encourage open and honest conversation without distractions.

3. Plan what you’re going to say

Each person involved should prepare what they want to say in advance. Using “I” statements, such as “I’m worried about your health,” rather than accusations like “You’re ruining your life,” helps keep the conversation supportive instead of confrontational.

4. Gather information about treatment options

Have solutions ready before the intervention. Research rehab programmes beforehand so that if the person is willing to accept help, they have immediate choices available. Make it as easy as possible for them to take the next step.

5. Prepare for resistance

Denial and defensiveness are common reactions. Plan how to stay calm if the person reacts negatively. Avoid arguing or forcing them to accept they have a problem—this is about expressing concern and offering support, not demanding immediate change.

6. Choose the right time

Avoid having the intervention when the person is intoxicated or dealing with a stressful situation. A time when they are sober and more likely to be receptive is ideal.

Carrying out an alcohol intervention

Sometimes, the best way to learn is through example. Below is a fictional scenario of an alcohol intervention, highlighting what was done well to increase its chances of success. While not every intervention follows the same path or runs smoothly as this one, there are valuable takeaways that can help guide a real-life approach.

Starting the intervention

David walked into his sister’s house, expecting to catch up over lunch. Instead, he saw his parents, his brother and his best friend sitting in the living room, looking serious.

“What’s this?” he asked, immediately on guard.

His sister, Laura, spoke first. “We need to talk about your drinking.”

David scoffed. “Not this again.” He turned to leave but his brother, Mark, calmly said, “Just hear us out. That’s all we ask.”

David hesitated but sat down.

Voicing concerns

Laura started by reading a short letter she had written:

“David, I love you. But I can’t ignore the fact that you’re drinking every day now. You missed Mum’s birthday and last week, you called me at 2 AM, drunk and didn’t remember the conversation the next day. It scares me.”

David rolled his eyes. “You’re overreacting.”

His father spoke next. “Son, I’m not judging you. But I see the signs. I’ve been where you are and I don’t want you to go down the same path.”

His best friend, Mike, added, “Man, I barely see you unless it involves drinking. And when we do, you always take it too far. We used to do other things together but now it’s just about alcohol.”

Dealing with resistance

David crossed his arms. “So, what, you all think I’m an alcoholic?”

Laura stayed calm. “We’re not here to put a label on you. We’re here because we love you and we’re worried.”

David sighed. “I can stop anytime I want.”

Mike gently responded, “Then why haven’t you?”

David didn’t have an answer.

Offering support

Laura handed him a pamphlet with information about a rehab programme. “No one’s forcing you but we found some options if you ever want to try.”

His mother, who had been quiet, finally spoke. “I just want my son back.”

David rubbed his face, clearly overwhelmed. “I need to think.”

Laura nodded. “That’s okay. We just want you to know we’re here, whenever you’re ready.”

A week later

David didn’t commit right away. But a week later, he called Laura. “Tell me more about that programme.”

She didn’t push. She just answered his questions. It was a step in the right direction.

What they did well

✅ Kept the group small and supportive

Instead of involving everyone in David’s life, only close family members and a trusted friend were part of the intervention. This helped create a space where he felt supported rather than ambushed. If too many people had been present or if anyone had a history of conflict with him, it could have led to more resistance rather than reflection.

✅ Choose a familiar setting

The intervention was held at Laura’s home, somewhere David felt comfortable. A neutral but familiar setting helps lower the chance of someone feeling trapped or attacked. If this had been done in a clinical setting or somewhere impersonal, David might have shut down immediately.

✅ Used ‘I’ statements

Rather than saying, “You’re ruining your life” or “You have a problem,” they framed their concerns in terms of how David’s drinking affected them. Laura said, “It’s scaring me,” and Mike said, “I barely see you unless it involves drinking.” This approach helped prevent David from becoming overly defensive, as it wasn’t about blaming him but expressing genuine concern.

✅ Didn’t argue or attack

When David dismissed their concerns or became defensive, no one snapped back at him or tried to force him to admit he had a problem. Instead, they remained calm and let him process what was being said. If they had started an argument or used harsh words, he likely would have shut down completely and walked away.

✅ Offered solutions, not demands

Instead of pushing David into immediate rehab or giving ultimatums, they simply presented him with information and let him make his own decision. This gave him a sense of control rather than feeling forced into something, which is often more effective in getting someone to accept help.

Where can I find alcohol rehab services?

Watching a loved one struggle with alcohol addiction can be overwhelming and while an intervention may seem like the right step, it is not always easy to navigate. Sanctuary Lodge does not offer alcohol intervention services but we can provide guidance on how to reduce alcohol consumption safely and support those ready to begin alcohol addiction treatment.

Our alcohol rehab programme offers expert-led care, helping individuals work toward giving up alcohol in a safe and structured way. If you are looking to help an alcoholic take that first step, contact us to learn more about our proven approach to recovery.