Dealing With Addiction Denial

• Melody Beattie

The ability to recognise your own shortcomings is an invaluable tool not only in addiction recovery but in every aspect of personal development. Denial is a powerful and destructive force that can distort a person’s reality and hold them back from the help they need and deserve.

Understanding denial’s role in addiction

The American Psychological Association (APA) defines denial as “a defence mechanism in which unpleasant thoughts, feelings, wishes or events are ignored or excluded from conscious awareness.” A person may deny or disavow an illness, financial problem or any negative situation they’re in as a way to resolve inner turmoil and mitigate their worries.

In addiction and substance use disorders, denial or a “lack of awareness” can be commonly found in the earliest stages of recovery. Denial often serves to keep a person unmotivated for change or to become resistant toward helpful advances from others.

Here, we can begin to imagine the uncountable number of people who never received the treatment they needed to save them from the destructive grip of addiction.

How addiction denial can appear in stages

Broadly speaking, a person in addiction denial will either be suffering right now or will grieve later. Denial is understood as the first stage in Kübler-Ross’ 5 Stages of Grief model. In this model, denial stands as the first and often greatest barrier stopping a person from accepting a painful situation and working towards recovery. The 5 stages of grief are Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression and Accepting.

As we look more closely at denial as the first hurdle, there may be further stages within each stage. These could be:

How can I recognise denial?

Denial operates as a defense mechanism and a counteraction to accepting help. If someone close to you has suggested you are in denial of addiction, it will help to take a step back and understand the suggestion from their perspective. You may have rationalised or normalised the extent of your addiction, so it is helpful to think about your drinking or substance use with these questions:

• Are you downplaying the role alcohol or drugs play in your life? It can be easy to disavow the risks of addiction by defending the fact you can still take care of your responsibilities. Thoughts like “My addiction isn’t a problem because I can still get my work done the next day” can become dangerous as addiction deepens and symptoms worsen.
• Do you compare your drug use to others and use that as a measurement? Before starting recovery, it is natural to compare your situation to another person and dismiss the fact that each addiction case is different. Claims like “My addiction isn’t that bad, I don’t do as much as others,” you are subconsciously reinforcing denial and fighting against the help that could save you.
• Is there an urge to blame others? Denial becomes a stronger force for destruction if it leads you to find others to blame for your situation. If you have thoughts like “If only my parents hadn’t ___” or “If my job didn’t stress me so much, I wouldn’t need to use ___”  The foundation of transforming denial into acceptance is letting go of blaming others.

How can I help someone close to me in addiction denial?

It is never easy to talk to a loved one about their substance use if they are caught in the throes of addiction. There are, however, steps you can take beforehand to make sure the help you offer is as strong as possible

If you’re hoping to get through to a loved one in addiction denial, try using these steps:

I need support with an addiction

Denial can make you feel like you’re trapped in a cage where you can see help but cant reach it. At times like this, we want to let you know that you’re not alone and escape is possible.

At Sanctuary Lodge, we provide specialist addiction treatment programmes designed to help you break through denial and regain control of your life. Our expert staff deliver complete detox and holistic treatments that keep you supported at every step of the journey.

If you or a loved one is struggling with addiction denial, don’t wait until it’s too late. Contact Sanctuary Lodge today and take the first step toward a more fulfilling and sober life.